In 2026, “The Verge” rolled out its back-to-school shopping guide, touting a blend of practical and aspirational products to prep students for the academic year ahead. But let’s break it down with a dash of wit and some critical insight.

First up: writing tools. The guide suggests that finding the perfect pen or notebook is as elusive as spotting Bigfoot during summer camp. While ergonomic pens and Moleskine notebooks are indeed popular, did they really need to splash in premium gel pens priced higher than a small laptop? A quick glance at Amazon reviews shows cheaper alternatives delivering comparable satisfaction—so maybe the guide overestimated the importance of brand prestige for penmanship.

Next: alarm clocks. The Verge claims these buzz-worthy gadgets can jolt even the most sleep-resistant teens from their slumber. But let’s be real—aren’t smartwatches and AI-powered bedside assistants already doing that job? A simple, well-placed Bluetooth speaker or a good old-fashioned vibrating pillow could have made the list just as effective, saving students from lugging around bulky clock radios.

Bags are another highlight, praised for their versatility between gym sessions and weekend getaways. Yet, did The Verge forget about the rise of modular backpacks with built-in solar panels and USB ports? These tech-savvy options could have easily outshone traditional totes, especially when students need to power devices on-the-go without lugging extra chargers.

Lastly, the guide’s mix of practicality and aspiration might just be a bit too broad. By aiming for both, it risks diluting focus—like trying to be the next big thing in tech and fine dining all at once. Sure, some students will love the aspirational picks (think smart notebooks with AI note-taking), but others might wonder why their budget-friendly options were left out in favor of premium picks that only a few can afford.

In summary, The Verge’s 2026 back-to-school guide nails the essentials while sprinkling in a few overpriced gems. It captures the spirit of modern student life but could benefit from a pinch more comparison and a splash of price-conscious choices to keep every learner happy from day one. So, grab your pens, set those alarms, and sling that bag—just make sure it’s not too heavy for the journey ahead!